Limbo

May 18, 2011

Intersection. Crossroads.

One stops. Looks right, left, ahead, behind.

If there is no one behind, one can take a few more minutes to decide which way to go.

Some roads take you back to where you came from. Some take you to unknown places, never before travelled. Some look familiar. Some, plain wrong.

But in the end, everything is fundamentally what one thinks he sees or wants to see.

We have the power to create heaven or hell. Good or bad. Simple or complicated.

Two fundamental emotions : Love. Fear. Those two color what is or seem to be, in front of one. I have been dwelling in fear lately. But really, and I know it, fear is not an option, it seems to be, but it is not as it chokes the life out of life.

The fear births confusion and now the choices are harder as the images are blurry, misshapen, misleading.

No one has showed up behind me yet. So I sit at the cross roads. The bike is clean, the load is light, the sun shines for a change, but I ponder clouds and storms. I ponder vague questions and half seen visions. There are no trees or shelter around. It’s an open field, I am a sitting duck.

It’s already May, almost June, this year is not turning out like I expected. Plans foiled at every turn. OK, then so I’ll have no plans…. or should I have more plans? Harder edges and firm forward motion?

Yeah… forward motion. A good concept.

I ask the Gods “what is indeed my next move supposed to be?”

I am doubting. I try to sleep on it but wake up weary. Limbo.

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One Response to “Limbo”

  1. David Walker Says:

    I know that you and Perry split up but were you not actually married to him and thus are you not legally still married to an American? You certainly still work with him. Maybe he can bring you into the US?
    love,
    david


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